Got a call from home that my baby is sick which kind of bummed the hell out of my day. nothing serious, just a little cold considering the weather. he is going to be fine, nothing to worry about. i hope. sucks though that i wont be there taking care of him. the only thing that i can do is send money, make sure he gets his medicine. yeah, doesn't sound very mummy-sh.
The call found me at that time of the month when you are holding to a couple of hundred shillings, hoping that will cater for your needs till the next paycheck. for a moment i did not know what to do. what i had was not enough. but i reached out to a friend who was not only willing to help but did not want me to pay back. to her Jeremy is also her son, and she would do anything for him.
That gesture made me cry. you see a lot of my friends consider me to be strong. i always seem to hold it together no matter what. but what they don't realize is that my strength comes from them. when someone is willing to drop everything for you and rush to your side, it stops and makes you think of how much richer life is. that phone call to find out how you are doing, if there is anything you need and how they can help. when someone truly takes interest in your life and not because they are looking for gossip but because they truly care is blessings that should be counted. i have been blessed and since i found out i could really write, i have always wanted to take a moment and thank all those that have truly enriched my life.
To my gals that held my hand and cried with me at the darkest time of my life, Chizi, Aggie, Mercy, Julia and Pauline, i could never repay you or get over the fact how at times you were even more scared for me than i was for myself.
To my second family, my sisters for twelve years now, Esta, Irene, Norah, Karis, Anette and Beth, life would be one dull mess without you guys. thank you for the love, the laughter and showing me what true love and friendship is all about. for sharing in my excitement and my pain and letting me share in yours with such sincere openness.
To my boys, you sure know how to make a girl feel special. for spoiling me, taking care of me, a sure sign that there is hope in men. AMEN!! Wayne, Robo, Pato, C.E.O, Adams, Allan, Jude, Silas, Festo, Ken smalls, and so many others , you are total darlings and i love you guys.
Most importantly to my family and my home girls Janet and Wangari , what more could a person ask for when they have you. And to God without whom i would have no life, family and friends to be grateful for. much appreciated guys. xoxo!!
Friday 20 April 2012
Wednesday 11 April 2012
moving on....
was home again for the Easter...man,i had waited for this mini holiday for the longest time. i have been working like a dog..so any chance that i get to get away..sounds like a gift from God. even more interesting was the fact that my whole family was there, with me. needless to say i enjoyed in immensely.
more so because i had the weirdest conversations with my dad...weird but very interesting. my dad thinks i should get back into the dating pool. whoah, i know!!!!!i was just as surprised. dads never tell that to their daughters, they like to keep them close and be overprotective.
not to say that he doesn't love me or care about me. it was because he loves me so much, he would want to see me finally happy. the last couple of years have been extremely hard and i think it killed my father watching me suffer as i did. so any chance of him seeing me smile, excited and giggling would be a huge relief to him.
so am i jumping back into the dating pool?..hell yeah!!!time i got my groove back Lord knows i had lost it for the longest time. and i think i sighted someone already. just the way i really like them...shhhhh don't tell him though, it might go into his head.
am i scared? very...its the scariest thing i have thought of doing in a long while.bearing your heart like that, opening your self to the possibility of pain and heartache is scary for anyone. but isn't that what life is all about?we are told we only have today, tomorrow is not promised to anyone, the people closest to us can hurt us the most; that is the irony of life. so we either choose to live afraid or courageously. i choose to be brave. i have only one life to live. it might work out or it might not. i do not know. but i choose to be happy and today i am happy, that is all that matters. tomorrow will take care of itself.
more so because i had the weirdest conversations with my dad...weird but very interesting. my dad thinks i should get back into the dating pool. whoah, i know!!!!!i was just as surprised. dads never tell that to their daughters, they like to keep them close and be overprotective.
not to say that he doesn't love me or care about me. it was because he loves me so much, he would want to see me finally happy. the last couple of years have been extremely hard and i think it killed my father watching me suffer as i did. so any chance of him seeing me smile, excited and giggling would be a huge relief to him.
so am i jumping back into the dating pool?..hell yeah!!!time i got my groove back Lord knows i had lost it for the longest time. and i think i sighted someone already. just the way i really like them...shhhhh don't tell him though, it might go into his head.
am i scared? very...its the scariest thing i have thought of doing in a long while.bearing your heart like that, opening your self to the possibility of pain and heartache is scary for anyone. but isn't that what life is all about?we are told we only have today, tomorrow is not promised to anyone, the people closest to us can hurt us the most; that is the irony of life. so we either choose to live afraid or courageously. i choose to be brave. i have only one life to live. it might work out or it might not. i do not know. but i choose to be happy and today i am happy, that is all that matters. tomorrow will take care of itself.
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